All About Worrying

We all do it.

And when we're in the throes of it, the last thing we want to hear off well-meaning others is “don't worry”. Have you ever wondered why those very words only cause you to worry all the more?

Well, there is a reason, and it's this. Our subconscious mind is incapable of recognising negatives (hence why when using affirmations, it should only be positive, i.e. affirm what you do want rather than what you don't want) so what it hears and processes is simply “worry”. It's not that your subconscious mind is stupid, nor is it doing this to spite you, it's just the way it is; concerned only with doing and not with not doing. And once you understand that, you can really turn it to your advantage – your subconscious mind is on your side fully and absolutely, after all, it just needs you to know how to communicate with it, to let it know exactly what you want in its own language.

So when it comes to worrying, our patterns are usually something like – worry followed by various methods of denial (telling yourself not to worry, letting others tell you not to worry, blanking it out completely by getting off your face on drugs or alcohol, hiding under the duvet hoping it will all go away) followed by worry. There's no getting away from the worry if there is something worrying you. Fact. You might as well take it by the short & curlies and handle it sooner rather than later then you can preserve your precious energy for the good things in life. And the most effective and speedy way to accomplish this is to change the way you look at worrying, change the message you are sending to your subconscious mind.

It doesn't matter what the actually worry itself is, the best thing you can do for starters is to accept that you are worried – own the worry, take responsibility for it, fully face up to it. Then, if there is nothing you can do right now to alleviate the worry, no action you can take to stop it in its track, start to talk to your subconscious mind and to the Tao within you.

Try something like “I choose now to see the perfect solution to (state your worry). I trust everything will resolve itself miraculously and easily.”

Or whatever feels right to you – the important thing is to avoid “don'ts” and to focus on what you do want – a satisfactory outcome – even though you don't know how that will transpire, or perhaps even what it will be. It's the absolute belief, that unquestioning faith that the Tao will sort it all out that creates the magic.

Next comes the tough bit! Forget about it. Go about your day, being as positive as you can, but forget the worry. This is not a case of denial like we were talking about a few paragraphs back, this is in fact, taking responsibility. If you go along with trusting that simply because you have asked, the Tao will provide the perfect outcome for you and everyone concerned, then you go about your day continuing to worry about it, the pictures you are creating in your mind's eye will be...well...worrying! You may end up inadvertently creating the very thing you are worrying about, the very worst outcome simply by seeing it so in your mind's eye. Your subconscious cannot differentiate what you're visualising and imagining and dreading from what's really happening in your physical reality and will get to work on providing you with what it thinks you want. So, no mixed messages – if you ask for a positive outcome, it's your job to keep focusing on a positive outcome. Even if you can't see one, if your worry is just so huge that you don't know how it can possibly ever be resolved, simply imagine yourself at some point in the very near future, looking relieved and happy, thinking “wow, that was so easy. I could never have imagined it would have turned out so well.”

There will always be something to worry about – it's not always necessarily a bad thing – but as with all things in life, it's how you choose to handle it that matters. Do we turn it to our advantage and grow through it, or do we exhaust ourselves through excessive worry? It's our choice always, but one thing is for sure – if we worry, we might as well be praying for what we don't want.

'Nuff said!