Self-Motivation

Oh, I don´t know if I can be bothered writing this!!

Only joking...although I have to admit I am feeling a tad tired today after an unusually poor night´s sleep, so I figure this is as good a day as any to write about self-motivation.

Perhaps the best way to look at this whole business of motivating ourselves, is to first of all ask what is stopping us from feeling motivated in the first place? It´s all too easy to flippantly blame “laziness” or “idleness” - we do love to beat ourselves up after all. But when you stop and think about it a little bit deeper, there is always something else going on beneath the surface.

For the most part, lack of motivation usually stems from fear; fear that we will be unable to cope with something, or won´t be able to complete it; fear that we will fail or do a bad job; fear that it won´t work out quite as we expected and we will have to admit we were wrong; fear that people will laugh at us and we´ll look silly. But as Stephen King says (and I am paraphrasing here) “getting started is the hard part, after that the rest is easy”.

So, let´s get started!

I find Qi Gong exercises the best to get me motivated, but anything that gets the energy flowing around the body and the mind is good – a quick boogie in the lounge to an uplifting tune, a jog around the block, a shower, scalp massage – whatever works for you, but it should be something you enjoy that´s going to make you feel good. Couple the activity with (yes, you guessed it) affirmations – something along the lines of “I am filled with motivated energy. I am charged with energised chi,” and within a very short space of time – less than 5 minutes – you´ll be starting to feel a slight buzz of enthusiasm.

Next, visualise yourself having done whatever it is you were so un-motivated to do, feeling chuffed to bits with yourself and telling someone you care about “you know what? I really wasn´t in the mood, but once I got started, it was easy and I loved every minute.” Try to feel as strongly as possible the relief, the pride, the excitement, the happiness, the sense of achievement you´ll feel...as this is true motivation. We all want to feel like that as much as possible, don´t we?

Having said that, there are inevitably times when we absolutely do not want to do a particular thing and sometimes this has nothing to do with motivation at all. Sometimes, it simply might not be right, might not be in our best interests or for our highest goods to do a certain thing at a certain time. It´s important to tell the difference. When our inner voice is advising us against doing something, the message will be calm and soft with an overriding sense of easiness about the decision. Putting a note in our planner to remind us to do it another day feels like the natural, sensible thing to do and almost immediately, we will feel prompted to do something else – something that will prove to be a more constructive and appropriate use of our time and energy at that moment.

In other words, follow where your inner voice and your energy is leading you. Go with the flow and you won´t go far wrong. As my hubby is fond of saying “don´t yin when you should yang and don´t yang when you should yin”.

Wise words indeed!

Until next time....Namaste.

:)

Breaking Free from Restrictive Situations

The good news is – there is no such thing as a restrictive situation. The bad news is – we just don´t (or won´t) believe it.

The illusion of reality is so strong that we honestly believe that certain situations, certain people, certain groups of people “out there” have some kind of hold over us and are the ones restricting us. And that, quite simply, is not the case.

Whilst it might appear on the surface that we are stuck in this mind-numbing job because (sharp inhale) how else would we pay the bills; whilst there may seem to be no way out of the abusive relationship we´ve tolerated for years; whilst we “just couldn´t” upsticks and move out of the two-horse town our family has lived in for generations; whilst we would never have the nerve to suggest a Yoga retreat as the annual holiday with our friends, instead of the obligatory week-long drinking binge in Iyanapa – what we need to understand is that all restrictions are self-imposed. They are inside us, not “out there”. And given that, as universal law dictates (whether we like it or believe in it or not), the outer world reflects our inner state of being, then it would seem to make sense to change the situation from the inside – in other words, change how we perceive the situation in our mind´s eye – and watch outer reality follow suit. Wouldn´t it? Good....

I know I rattle on and on in these columns about the power of affirmations, but what can I tell you...I do them all the time and they work. ´Nuff said. So, it should come as no surprise that my first suggestion, if you´re serious about breaking free from whatever restrictions you are experiencing in your life, is the following affirmation which I learned from Barefoot Doctor at his Global Meditation & Dub Spirit events.

“I am free to do whatever I choose. I have everything to gain and nothing to lose.”

Over and over again – it´s a good one to chant in your head (or under your breath...even at the top of your voice if the fancy takes you) whilst walking, I´ve found. By keeping on affirming this with as much feeling behind it as you can muster, you are in effect stating to the Tao, the Universe, your Higher Self, God/dess, the Divine (whatever your preferred term for the Absolute) that you are now living in a state of trust and faith that the miracle, the gift of your being alive here and now was not to make you suffer or struggle, or to restrict you in any way. We are divine sparks of light, perfect expressions of the Tao in human form – how can that ever be restricted? Think about it. It can´t!

If you are feeling restricted in any area of your life, it is a sign that there is something better awaiting you. It is nothing less than an opportunity to move forward, to grow, to achieve your full potential, to attain your perfect fulfilment and satisfaction – you deserve no less and rest assured, this is what the Tao expressing itself through you wants.

So, welcome the restrictions – or at least acknowledge them. Then spend time visualising yourself in your mind´s eye, completely free of all restrictions – feeling relieved and exhilarated and immensely grateful for the way things have turned out. And here´s the tricky bit for us control-freak humans – DO NOT try to figure out the hows and whys – you don´t need to know HOW it will all work out (this will only get in the way of the power behind this visualisation because your rational mind will end up talking you out of it by telling you how this couldn´t possibly work because of that blah blah blah) – you just need to put out the message to the universe that you trust that it WILL all work out. And you know why that is....it´s because that´s the universe´s job – to sort out the details and shift reality about so that your affirmations and visualisations manifest in the “real” world in the best possible way for you and everyone else concerned.

It´s the expert at it.

We´re rubbish at it.

So, just ask it to do it and let it get on with it.

And above all, as you find these perceived restrictions suddenly magically and effortlessly overcome, as you find yourself naturally flowing more easily in your life, don´t forget to maintain an attitude of gratitude.

To everyone and everything in your life.

To all that is.

Always.

:)

Keeping Yourself Protected from Negative Energy

The first thing that we really need to get to grips with here, the most important thing to understand, is that energy – negative or otherwise – only ever comes our way as a direct reflection of what energy we have been putting out. What you put out, you get back. Usually multiplied. Think negative thoughts about someone – in other words, put out negative energy – then that negative energy will bounce right back to you (and not necessarily from the person you directed it to in the first place). The flip side to this, of course, is that all good & loving thoughts/energy you beam out will also return to you multiplied. So, you see what I´m getting at here – making sure you keep your thoughts positive and kind is a key factor in keeping you protected from negative energy.

But, come on, there are inevitably times when we feel downright bloody-minded and end up having a good old bitching session about this person, that situation. None of us are saints (and if there are any saints reading this, please get in touch and I will re-write this column!) and living in the World of the Ten Thousands Things (as the Taoists call it) can be confusing, fearful, frustrating and annoying – all the things guaranteed to get our negative juices flowing. All we can do is to be aware of the thoughts and energy we are projecting and if they are not so positive once in a while, to refrain from beating ourselves up and simply acknowledge the fact we are having a bad hair day, then consciously beam out some good vibes to get our balance back.

So whilst it certainly helps to be aware that, on a deep level, we are responsible for all the energy coming our way, I´m sure we´ve all had times in our lives when we´ve been on the receiving end of some-one´s negative energy (a psychic attack, as it were) and we haven´t a clue why. Why should it be that the first time you meet a particular person, you feel hostility emanating from them straight away? Why does this other person always somehow make you feel inadequate, or wind you up? You know the type of thing I´m talking about. Maybe it´s just their issues, perhaps they´re jealous of you, perhaps you inadvertently once said something they took exception to. Who knows? Shit happens. But the one thing we can be sure of is that we will receive a gentle warning from the Tao – a kind of “watch your back here” sensation. And this is tricky, because I believe all of us are a bit paranoid at times and we need to distinguish between the incessant chatter going on in our heads that tells us we are unworthy and the world is a hostile place full of hostile people, and that quiet voice that whispers only truths for our highest good.

The more we can be tuned in at all times to that little voice, the more protected we will be from negative energy. See my article on “Intuition Rocks” for a more in-depth explanation, but in a nutshell, anything in your head that sounds harsh and shrill and makes your stomach flip in a sort of “oh no” fashion is more than likely to be “monkey mind” and should be viewed with suspicion. Anything that comes through quietly and calmly, more from the back of your mind rather than the emotion-fuelled front, and gives you a comforting sense of “a-ha” will be what you truly need to know. The more meditation you do, the more you focus on your breathing (deep into your abdomen and not shallow in your chest), the more Yoga, Qi Gong & Tai Chi you can incorporate into your daily life, the more easily you will be able to attune to your inner voice and the clearer all things will be.

Affirmations and visualisations, as always, are wonderful tools. Start each day visualising a rose-coloured light emanating from your heart. Watch it as it expands and forms a bubble around you. Charge it with the power to allow in only good, loving, healing vibes and to bounce back to the universe any negative energy that may come your way, for it to be refined into something more positive. Then affirm as many times as you can as you go through your day - “I am safe and divinely protected always”.

And it will be so. For you and everyone you come into contact with.

And so it is. :)

Miracles

The first thing you should know about miracles – and this may come as a bit of a shock – is that they are, in fact, quite natural and not really miraculous at all. Now I´m not dissing miracles here – far from it – I´m merely pointing out that miracles are not just random things that happen to us if we are extremely lucky; no, miracles are (or can be) a standard part of our everyday reality. They are our birthright – a gift from the Tao that we can tune into and instigate whenever we want.

And if we do want to do that, we need to get back into miracle-mindedness – stop seeing miracles as things like winning the lottery or getting your kids to do the dishes, and focus instead on the mind-boggling fact that you are currently on a planet hurtling through space at an astonishing rate of knots and, against all the odds, you are ALIVE. That, my friends, is a miracle! Once we´ve had chance to digest that and fully realise its significance, then we start to see miracles all around us every day and the more we can live in a state of miracle-mindedness, the more miracles come our way.

Of course, there are always times when something happens in our lives and we need a big, fat miracle to help us out. To instigate a miracle, affirmations work really well. Try something like “I am now instigating a miracle in my life to resolve (state issue) easily and gracefully” or more simply, just “I am now expecting miracles in my life”. Then perhaps try a spot of visualisation – seeing yourself in your mind´s eye, excited and grateful at said miracle having occurred and your life now being more in flow as a result – you don´t need to know what form the miracle will come in (in fact, don´t even try to guess – it´s the Tao´s job to sort out the finer details and it might find it quite rude if you start interfering) – just focus on the sense of relief, thankfulness and excitement you will undoubtedly feel once it happens. Then, just get on with your day. Don´t worry about it, don´t even think about it too much, just trust that a miracle is on its way and will occur at exactly the right time. This is difficult, I know, but try to think of it like ordering your food in a restaurant. Once you´ve told the waiter what you want, you don´t keep jumping up every few seconds and dashing to the kitchen just to make sure the chef´s got the order and is preparing your food right, do you? No, you just assume everything is being handled behind the scenes, you relax and look forward to your meal -and the same is true of miracles. Expect them and they will come.

Life was never meant to be a struggle. The Tao knows that and miracles know that, it´s just we humans who have forgotten. Let´s all try to remember as often as possible now, that it is perfectly all right to ask for help, and it´s perfectly all right to expect that help to come to us by way of miracles – it´s what they do best, after all!

And who knows...the more of us bringing miracles into our lives, the more positive energy we will be spreading and wouldn´t that make a better world for everyone?

I´d say so.

All About Worrying

We all do it.

And when we're in the throes of it, the last thing we want to hear off well-meaning others is “don't worry”. Have you ever wondered why those very words only cause you to worry all the more?

Well, there is a reason, and it's this. Our subconscious mind is incapable of recognising negatives (hence why when using affirmations, it should only be positive, i.e. affirm what you do want rather than what you don't want) so what it hears and processes is simply “worry”. It's not that your subconscious mind is stupid, nor is it doing this to spite you, it's just the way it is; concerned only with doing and not with not doing. And once you understand that, you can really turn it to your advantage – your subconscious mind is on your side fully and absolutely, after all, it just needs you to know how to communicate with it, to let it know exactly what you want in its own language.

So when it comes to worrying, our patterns are usually something like – worry followed by various methods of denial (telling yourself not to worry, letting others tell you not to worry, blanking it out completely by getting off your face on drugs or alcohol, hiding under the duvet hoping it will all go away) followed by worry. There's no getting away from the worry if there is something worrying you. Fact. You might as well take it by the short & curlies and handle it sooner rather than later then you can preserve your precious energy for the good things in life. And the most effective and speedy way to accomplish this is to change the way you look at worrying, change the message you are sending to your subconscious mind.

It doesn't matter what the actually worry itself is, the best thing you can do for starters is to accept that you are worried – own the worry, take responsibility for it, fully face up to it. Then, if there is nothing you can do right now to alleviate the worry, no action you can take to stop it in its track, start to talk to your subconscious mind and to the Tao within you.

Try something like “I choose now to see the perfect solution to (state your worry). I trust everything will resolve itself miraculously and easily.”

Or whatever feels right to you – the important thing is to avoid “don'ts” and to focus on what you do want – a satisfactory outcome – even though you don't know how that will transpire, or perhaps even what it will be. It's the absolute belief, that unquestioning faith that the Tao will sort it all out that creates the magic.

Next comes the tough bit! Forget about it. Go about your day, being as positive as you can, but forget the worry. This is not a case of denial like we were talking about a few paragraphs back, this is in fact, taking responsibility. If you go along with trusting that simply because you have asked, the Tao will provide the perfect outcome for you and everyone concerned, then you go about your day continuing to worry about it, the pictures you are creating in your mind's eye will be...well...worrying! You may end up inadvertently creating the very thing you are worrying about, the very worst outcome simply by seeing it so in your mind's eye. Your subconscious cannot differentiate what you're visualising and imagining and dreading from what's really happening in your physical reality and will get to work on providing you with what it thinks you want. So, no mixed messages – if you ask for a positive outcome, it's your job to keep focusing on a positive outcome. Even if you can't see one, if your worry is just so huge that you don't know how it can possibly ever be resolved, simply imagine yourself at some point in the very near future, looking relieved and happy, thinking “wow, that was so easy. I could never have imagined it would have turned out so well.”

There will always be something to worry about – it's not always necessarily a bad thing – but as with all things in life, it's how you choose to handle it that matters. Do we turn it to our advantage and grow through it, or do we exhaust ourselves through excessive worry? It's our choice always, but one thing is for sure – if we worry, we might as well be praying for what we don't want.

'Nuff said!